Non-woodworkers woodworking terminology

[TerryMcK]

I was reading through a few threads on Woodtalk last night and my wife asked me "What are we looking at tonight - biscuits - I know all about biscuits?"

I said "No just reading a few threads about what is happening in the community"

She said "Are you reading about those nip and tuck joints - you know those bits on the corners of drawers?"

 

It took me a couple of seconds to register and then I said "Do you mean dovetail joints?"

She said "Yes I knew they had a strange name but they look like nip and tucks to me"

 

 

 

Anybody else come across anything like that before?

 

[Freddie]

Not woodworking, but when i redid my boss's basement and bar a few years ago, they subbed tile work. My bosses wife referred to the holes in the grout as holidays. I never heard that term until then.

[wdwerker]

Oh yea, I have heard " holidays" for missed stain or paint areas too. One lady wanted " V " corners.

[Eric.]

My tools are "toys."  My shop is called "your room."  My bench is a "table."  Everything else is called "things" and "stuff."  She pretty much ignores me and everything I do.  I call that a "blessing."

[RichardA]

them: "you are so good at carpentry, can you put crown moulding in my dining room"

me: "no, not really. Just look at the crown moulding in my bathroom."

them: "but you build furniture"

me: "yes with really expensive machines that make 90 degree angles. these machines won't fit in your dining room and you don't have a square corner in your house. "

them: "you have a paint sprayer. Can I borrow it"

me: "its a gun, not a sprayer, and no, hell no"

them: "i love that table. what kind of stain did you use"

me: "no stain. its walnut. that is the color of the wood"

them: "then how did you get it all shiny"

me: "that is a clear top coat"

them: "so you did stain it"

me: "no"

them: "then how did you make it dark and shiny"

Yeah, how'd you do that?

[Rapid Roger]

I need a thing-a-ma-jig to hold the do-hicky to the whats-ya-call-it.

 

Rog

[..Kev]

I need a thing-a-ma-jig to hold the do-hicky to the whats-ya-call-it.

 

Rog

 

That sounds strangely like my wife who gets angry if I don't know what she's talking about  

[wdwerker]

I had a wife like that once.....

[dwacker]

My wife actually knows more than she lets on, I think she has truly listened over the years. I told her I was putting spindles in my daughters router tables. She replied with "good that makes me feel better" "she wont need a shaper to reverse the bits". Sometimes she floors me with how much she really knows and has never touched a tool.

[Vyrolan]

...and has never touched a tool.

 

Wait, I thought you had a daughter?

[dwacker]

Wait, I thought you had a daughter?

 

[ColinF]

The roles are reversed when my wife asks me to grab her purse and instead I grab her handbag, satchel, bag or tote. Apparently these are different things that serve different purposes. Only one of them holds money.

ha, after being nearly beat for getting in my moms purse when I was a kid I get NOTHING from my wife's purse, I just hand it to her. Dad always said there's things in those that purses that no man wants to see

[wdwerker]

I learned the same lesson and have done the same with ladies purses all my life ! Here, you dig it out, I'm not gonna even look inside.

[tim0625]

My tools are "toys."  My shop is called "your room."  My bench is a "table."  Everything else is called "things" and "stuff."  She pretty much ignores me and everything I do.  I call that a "blessing."

Bench=table....that's just wrong. My wife pretty much lets me go and come as I please. 

On the verbal side though, if you removed "thing and thingy" from the language, she'd be mute in an hour.

Purses - growing up, mom's purse was the 'off limits place...don't look at it...don't touch it....don't even THINK about looking in it.'

My wife - for 31 years now - has said things like "look in my handbag and give me xx....".....gives me the willies every time.