RichardA

My final gift to my wife, and my final post of this thread.

Recommended Posts

Sorry I am late with my condolences. Thank you for sharing your story. My thoughts are with you and your family.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Im not here often lately but you have been in my thoughts often. As you no its been a ruff year for Barbara and I and its been hard to even think of things to come one day never mind dealing with it when it happens as you are.  Very sad thing and Im sorry Rick.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Had some down time at work, haven't been active on here in a few years (about 4), thought I'd drop in and catch up a bit on what I've been missing.  I don't want to make this about me so I hope the following conveys what it's intended to:

Y'all made me cry ... at work.  I'm hoping nobody walks up to ask me a question.

There will be many times you think, "I should remember to tell her about this." and then remember that she probably already knows.  There will be other times you think, "She would like this." and then realize that she already does.  We call it loss, but they never really leave us.  There there in the whisper of a breeze, the turn of a phrase, the smell of a flower or fresh baked cookies.  Reminders are all around as of the blessings of the short time we have together.  Enjoy the memories as you consider your loss.  I'm thankful for the time you got to spend with your angel.

Now I need a new, unused tissue.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
40 minutes ago, Byrdie said:

Had some down time at work, haven't been active on here in a few years (about 4), thought I'd drop in and catch up a bit on what I've been missing.  I don't want to make this about me so I hope the following conveys what it's intended to:

Y'all made me cry ... at work.  I'm hoping nobody walks up to ask me a question.

There will be many times you think, "I should remember to tell her about this." and then remember that she probably already knows.  There will be other times you think, "She would like this." and then realize that she already does.  We call it loss, but they never really leave us.  There there in the whisper of a breeze, the turn of a phrase, the smell of a flower or fresh baked cookies.  Reminders are all around as of the blessings of the short time we have together.  Enjoy the memories as you consider your loss.  I'm thankful for the time you got to spend with your angel.

Now I need a new, unused tissue.

It's been quite awhile since we've heard from you. Welcome back.  This was not an effort to make you cry.  I've been doing that for a year or two, mostly without my wife knowing it. Her last couple of years were painful to watch, and try to help make it easier for her never seemed to do any good. I've been finding notes here and there that she wrote, describing what she was going through. And nearly every one of them ended with  "Am  I ever going to be normal again"? The destructive force of that question, did and still does rip my heart out.   Stick around for a few more days, I'm thinking about closing this thread down, but first I have one more thing to add to it, and that happens Sunday.  Hang around for that if you would.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the kind words and the reply Rick.  Don't worry about the crying.  For you it's necessary.  For me it's a combination of how much you touched my heart and a condition I have that keeps my emotions close to the surface.  I'll be around, promise.

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Prayers for you and your family Richard.   I know that wasn't easy for you and I'm glad you took some time to spend with her and try to get your thoughts together.

 

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Since I tend to disappear from internet forums for weeks at a time, I just found this thread.

I'm very sorry for your loss. The casket looks very nice, and I'm sure was a very difficult project to do.

Building the casket and setting the stone yourself is more than almost anyone else would do.

I'll be praying for you as you continue your journey in this life.

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, ..Kev said:

Prayers for you and your family Richard.   I know that wasn't easy for you and I'm glad you took some time to spend with her and try to get your thoughts together.

 

 

47 minutes ago, treeslayer said:

Well done my friend, you are an inspiration to all of us, your caring and thoughtfulness thru all of this shows us how we can be better men ourselves, Linda will always be with you and smiling down. My personal thanks for including all of us along this very difficult path. 

I know it's not normal, but then I've never been considered that, but while I was talking to Linda today, you both came up, for the inspiration you guys have sent my way.  She was stubborn today and didn't even say thank you..  I'm sure she meant to, or did, but I may be to far gone to hear her.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, freedhardwoods said:

Since I tend to disappear from internet forums for weeks at a time, I just found this thread.

I'm very sorry for your loss. The casket looks very nice, and I'm sure was a very difficult project to do.

Building the casket and setting the stone yourself is more than almost anyone else would do.

I'll be praying for you as you continue your journey in this life.

I've found in my 76 years that if you expect someone to do something for you, the odds are that you'll be disappointed.  I couldn't allow my wife to be buried in a casket that was built on a conveyor belt. It had to be very personal, and as hard as it was, it was extremely satisfying, though painful. Setting the stone was no different.  She is my wife, and I'll take care of all her needs, just as I did the previous 21 years.  She extended my life by 21 years, I could do no less for her.   Thanks.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, RichardA said:

It's the very first conversation I've ever had with her where she didn't interrupt me. That to was unnerving.

Rick, as has been said, hopefully this will begin a path to closure for you. As usual, you bring the gift of levity to what had to be one of life's greatest challenges. You have honored her in the best, and most personal of ways.

Happy birthday!

PS - My parents married on this day, 1947.

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Rick, your post from today brought me to tears sitting in my chair in the shop. I cannot fathom the pain, but I'm so happy for you, for those 21 incredible years.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Mick S said:

Rick, as has been said, hopefully this will begin a path to closure for you. As usual, you bring the gift of levity to what had to be one of life's greatest challenges. You have honored her in the best, and most personal of ways.

Happy birthday!

PS - My parents married on this day, 1947.

I was only 5 when they married..  But look at what they produced.   You, my friend, so the 30th of December has to be a good omen and day.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
56 minutes ago, Spanky said:

Happy Birthday Rick............. Everyday will get alittle better.

I sure as hell hope so Rickey.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.